Lindsey De Grande - Trying to Beat Cancer - Part 2

This is Part 2 in a series. Missed Part 1 of Lindsey's story? Click here to read it.

Treatment & my life today

It has been 4 years since I was diagnosed, and a lot has happened. I haven't reached complete molecular remission (yet) and I'm currently taking my third type of medication. The side effects are really disrupting my life and, although I'm trying as hard as I can to keep reaching my dreams and goals, the treatment makes it very hard. If I would believe in the word, which I don't, I would even say that some of my goals have become "impossible."

At every check-up in Leuven, the doctors are looking at my cancer, while I'm  looking more and more for solutions...to feel better again. I'm put on other types of medication, increased doses, really anything to help improve the way that I feel. I need the hope that this won't be 'forever,' that my life won't always revolve around doctors, medication, side effects, tiredness, headaches, and a big lack of energy. I'm too young to sit in a chair, "happy to be alive," but not much more than that. I am at the age where I should be my strongest. Where I should do all those crazy things, or just know that I could do them if I really wanted to. Not waking up and "deleting" the 9 out of 10 "normal" things that were on my to do list because of how I feel.

Don't get me wrong...I have a lot to be thankful for. But what I get the opportunity to live, when cancer gets to a chronic stage or chronic disease, I really want to live, not just survive. And because I believe we can find a cure, I will keep looking for it until I have found it. I keep believing in a world without cancer!

Check back on Wednesday for Part 3 of Lindsey's story!